I normally wouldn’t inject my politics into a baking/cooking blog, but given that theres an election next year and this ties in to both baking and politics (and also how cool my mother is), I’m going to discuss it. I hope most people who read this are evolved enough and smart enough to realize this is, indeed, despite our current president’s efforts… a free country. So me speaking my mind briefly in my blog is my business and my right. My theory is this: if you see or hear something you don’t like, turn it off or stop reading. It’s that simple. If you don’t like it, skip it. The main point of the blog is the baking, really. So comment on that, if anything. Thanks.
Fucking awesome cookies of democracy.
True story: I have been a Democrat since birth. I swear. Or at least since childhood. When I began 6th grade, it was fall of 1992- the year of the election when Bill Clinton was elected the first time. I was already a fan. No joke. I was preaching to the other kids as if we really had any say in things, I was like a little campaign manager. As if we could vote! It helps I guess that my mom was all about him too (don’t even ask about my father’s view) but hey, I was only 11/12. Anyway my class was having little mock elections and stuff, and everything was themed according to the elections. My teacher was going to have a party and asked for two volunteers; one person to make Clinton’s Chips and one person to make Bush’s Batch (I swear to effin’ GOD thats what the recipe was called). So of course I jumped out of my seat and waved my hand around like a freak and said I’d bake Clinton’s Chips. Hell yeah. Some other kid wanted to make Bush’s Batch (which still sounds dirty, I’m sorry, maybe I’m juvenile but really…) and the teacher gave us each a recipe in the form of a ditto. (Side note: remember dittos!? The writing was purple! And it had that funny smell… Holy crap, pre-Xerox! Okay, so I’m old… I also played Oregon Trail on DOS… what of it?!)
I shoved the recipe in my backpack and forgot all about it until 11:30 that night (I never had a bedtime, I could stay up as late as I wanted.. are you jealous?) when I remembered that I had to have these cookies the next day. So I told my mother and god bless her, at midnight we went to King Kullen (I have long since stopped going there in favor of Kings or Stop & Shop) and we came home and she made Clinton’s Chips. Which, by the way, were voted better than Bush’s Batch the next day in school at our little party. Now, maybe it was because the name of the other cookie candidate was reminiscent of a female’s privates, that is entirely possible with 6th graders. But I prefer to think the reason is because these are some fucking KICK ASS cookies. And by the way: my mother is awesome. Which is probably why I’m so awesome. That kinda stuff is inherited, yanno.
Now I don’t know if the Bush ones were an actual Bush family recipe, but apparently the Clinton ones were. And thats’ where this blog comes in.
Yes folks, I am giving you Hillary Clinton’s recipe for chocolate chip cookies. And if you don’t believe me, heres a link to prove it. I plan on making them on election night 2008 and praying silently that another Republican doesn’t get elected into office.
HILLARY CLINTON’S CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES
- 1 1/2 cup unsifted all-purpose flour
- 1 teaspoon salt
- 1 teaspoon baking soda
- 1 cup solid vegetable shortening
- 1 cup firmly packed light brown sugar
- 1/2 cup granulated sugar
- 1 teaspoon vanilla
- 2 eggs
- 2 cups old-fashioned rolled oats
- 1 (12-ounce) package semi-sweet chocolate chips
- Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
- Grease baking sheets. Combine flour, salt and baking soda.
- Beat together shortening, sugars and vanilla in a large bowl until creamy. Add eggs, beating until light and fluffy. Gradually beat in flour mixture and rolled oats. Stir in chocolate chips.
- Drop batter by well-rounded teaspoonsful on to greased baking sheets.
- Bake 8 to 10 minuter or until golden. Cool cookies on sheets on wire rack for 2 minutes. Remove cookies to wire rack to cool completely.
They’re the best chocolate chip cookies I ever had, and not only do I think so. Everyone who’s tasted them has said the same. Feed them to your local Conservatives and after they gush about how delicious they are- tell ’em the name.